] If you're in a contaminated building with no exits
] whatsoever, at least book it to the opposite corner.

I simply cannot get enough of the ready.gov parodies.

Unready.net - Be Amused - Chemical Threat - Visual Guide

] DANBURY, Conn., 6:10 p.m. EST February 25, 2003 -
] Officials at Western Connecticut State University are
] looking into a dormitory party that allegedly featured
] female strippers.
]
] "They were naked with little high heel shoes on," Holly
] Szymanski, 18, a freshman said.

College Not Teased Over Alleged Dorm Stripper Bash

] Meet Robert Jackson. The 57-year-old Michigan man was hit
] Monday (2/24) with prostitution charges for organizing
] "CumFest 2003," a January sex party involving about 50
] men and three hookers. According to investigators,
] Jackson planned to film the fest--which took place in a
] suburban Marriott hotel--and sell a videotape of the
] event via a web site operated by one of the prostitutes.
] But, mid-orgy, Jackson's bash was crashed by Romulus
] cops, who learned of the gathering from the hotel's
] manager (who found out about "CumFest 2003" from a woman
] whose 17-year-old son had received an e-mail invitation
] to the event). Jackson, who faces a maximum of five years
] in jail on the felony charges, is no stranger to kinky
] scenes. He was nabbed in June 2001 for throwing a
] similar--though untitled--soiree in another Michigan
] hotel. (2 pages)

The Smoking Gun: Archive

] A woman in northeastern Ohio may have done too thorough a
] job with her snowman %u2013 or snow-woman, to be exact.

WPVI.com: Woman has to Cover Up Busty Snow-Woman

] A protest we can all agree on.

AP Photo - 700 Nude Women Make 'No War' Sign on Hillside

] June 25th box set to include entire TV series, four
] director's cut episodes, final movie cut, and bonus disc
] with never-before seen "live-action" version of the
] film.

] Gainax's upcoming re-release of Neon Genesis
] Evangelion will combine the classic series with several
] features never-before released in Japan or elsewhere. In
] addition to new component digital master "by re-doing the
] telecine from scratch" and both 2.0 and 5.1 audio tracks
] (both previously announced), the new box set will include
] several unreleased "visual clips."

Anime News Network - New Evangelion Release Details

] On May 19, 1995, I received a standard-sized gray
] envelope, stuffed with what looked like, through a small
] cellophane window, a check for $95,093.35.

] The documents I had expected to make me cry actually
] made me laugh out loud. First Interstate Bank of
] California was abbreviated throughout as FICAL. An acronym
] pronounced as fecal, not fical, I thought. This is a fecal
] matter.

Bank Error In My Favor: Collect $95,000: Man 1, Bank 0

Shuttle Columbia has been lost durring reentry.

Update: That is now confirmed by NASA. A large explosion has been reported in the Dallas FtW area. NASA is saying to say away from any wreckage found.

TURN ON THE TV, RIGHT NOW, ANY CHANNEL

Check out Bubb Rubb and L'il Sis talkin bout whistlers.

Humor, on so many levels

Stolen from a posting on Slashdot.

1. A tremor in the pants. The last time I felt this was in the presence of my old master.

2. You are unwise to lower your pants.

3. We've got to be able to get some reading on those pants, up or down.

4. She must have hidden the plans in her pants. Send a detachment down to retrieve them. See to it personally Commander.

5. These pants may not look like much, kid, but they've got it where it counts.

6. I find your lack of pants disturbing.

7. These pants contain the ultimate power in the Universe. I suggest we use it.

8. Han will have those pants down. We've got to give him more time!

9. General Veers, prepare your pants for a surface assault.

10. I used to bulls-eye womp-rats in my pants back home.

11. TK-421. . . Why aren't you in your pants?

12. Lock the door. And hope they don't have pants.

13. Governor Tarkin. I recognized your foul pants when I was brought on board.

14. You look strong enough to pull the pants off of a Gundark.

15. Luke. . . Help me take...these pants off.

16. Great, Chewie, great. Always thinking with your pants.

17. That blast came from those pants. That thing's operational!

18. Don't worry. Chewie and I have gotten into a lot of pants more heavily guarded than this.

19. Maybe you'd like it back in your pants, your highness.

20. Your pants betray you. Your feelings for them are strong. Especially for your sister!

21. Jabba doesn't have time for smugglers who drop their pants at the first sign of an Imperial Cruiser.

22. Yeah, well short pants is better than no pants at all, Chewie.

23. Attention. This is Lando Calrissean. The Empire has taken control of my pants, I advise everyone to leave before more troops arrive.

24. I cannot teach him. The boy has no pants.

25. You came in those pants? You're braver than I thought.

25 Lines From Star Wars that can be improved if you substitute the word 'Pants'