For every scientific breakthrough, you can expect a new branch pseudo-science that will mirror genuine science in some distorted way. In the nineteeth century, the young branch of engineering that spawned electrical current also spawned quack "electrotherapies" that promised to heal you with the amazing powers of electricity. And phrenology (reading your personality through bumps on your head) became popular just as neuroscience and psychiatry were taking their first baby steps. What new psuedo-sciences can you expect in the twenty-first century? We've got some ideas.
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Network Divining
Having trouble with your network connections? Does your cell phone signal drop out at random in certain parts of your house? The best way to solve your problem, according to quack science, will be with a special "network divining rod," an LED device that will start blinking if it finds a "break" in your network signals. Unhappy Google-AOL-BT-NewsCorp customers can use it to locate where exactly the problems are in the global phone-computer-media network, and then buy another device, full of network enhancing crystals, to repair the break. Expect the usual promises: "Guaranteed to work! We've got testimonials from many happy customers!"
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EMF Focusers
Every mobile device emits a small amount of microwave radiation. While we used to believe that was dangerous, it turned out that in fact it was neutral. Based on that idea, future quacks will claim that there is actually a benefit to mobile phone radiation. After all, when people put their cell phones next to the heads, it turns out they have more to say and their vocabularies get bigger. So these quacks will start selling mobile apps that promise to "focus" cell phone radiation to certain regions of your brain that you want to develop more quickly. Want to learn another language really quickly? Get the language stimulation package. Want to inspire yourself to exercise more? Get the goal-attainment package. You don't even have to hold the mobile in a different position! The software does it all for you.
I can't wait till these things hit ebay.
