There are three great cities in the United States: there's Los Angeles, Chicago, and New York – in that order.

I love Boston; I even love Denver; I like Miami; I think Washington DC is habitable; but Los Angeles is Los Angeles. You can't compare it to Paris, or to London, or to Rome, or to Shanghai. You can interestingly contrast it to those cities, sure, and Los Angeles even comes out lacking; but Los Angeles is still Los Angeles.

No matter what you do in L.A., your behavior is appropriate for the city. Los Angeles has no assumed correct mode of use. You can have fake breasts and drive a Ford Mustang – or you can grow a beard, weigh 300 pounds, and read Christian science fiction novels. Either way, you're fine: that's just how it works. You can watch Cops all day or you can be a porn star or you can be a Caltech physicist. You can listen to Carcass – or you can listen to Pat Robertson. Or both.

L.A. is the apocalypse: it's you and a bunch of parking lots. No one's going to save you; no one's looking out for you. It's the only city I know where that's the explicit premise of living there – that's the deal you make when you move to L.A.

The city, ironically, is emotionally authentic.

It says: no one loves you; you're the least important person in the room; get over it.

What matters is what you do there.

Now seems like a good time to offer some quotes from Swingers:

Mike: What the fuck are you carrying a gun for? What, in case somebody steps to you, Snoop Dogg?
Sue: Hey man, you're not from here, alright. You don't know how it is. I grew up in L.A.
Trent: Anaheim.
Sue: Whatever, man. It's different out here.

And this one, a bit longer, from the script:

                             MIKE
                        (indicating the ladies)
                   I'm going in.  Will you be my wing-man?

                             ROB
                   I'll be your winger.

        They make the approach.  With a great deal of effort, Mike
        catches their attention...

                             MIKE
                   Good evening, ladies...

        ... only to be interrupted by the party STOPPING to check
        another entrance.

        Beat.

        The party RESUMES and the blondes redirect their attention to
        Mike.  He is a little put-off but, God love him, he gets back
        in there.

                             MIKE
                   How are you ladies doing this evening?

                             BLONDE
                   What do you drive?

                             MIKE
                   I'm sorry?

                             BLONDE
                   What kind of car do you drive?

                             MIKE
                   Oh... a Cavalier.

        The blondes immediately enter back into their conversation as
        if they were never approached.

        Mike and Rob exchange defeated glances.

        One more try.

                             MIKE
                   ... It's red?

Greater Los Angeles | BLDGBLOG

Manhattan is pretty.

We don't know what prompted Agence France-Presse to charter a helicopter Sunday and send one of their photogs to take a bunch of aerial shots of the city, and we don't know what prompted Getty Images to distribute those shots in the middle of the week, but we're glad they both did.

More gratuitous urban-beauty shots after the jump.

On a Clear Day

A statutory rape case against a 42-year-old charged as a man took on a different look after a jail shower revealed the defendant is actually a woman.

The female victim and several prisoners at the Hamilton County Jail were among those surprised to discover that the person booked in the case as Alexander David Cross is a woman also known as Elaine Ann Cross.

Cross had been in jail awaiting a court appearance Wednesday, where she pleaded guilty to an aggravated statutory rape charge as part of a deal with prosecutors. The charge stems from a sexual relationship with a 15-year-old girl.

See also, Out-of-towners enjoy Murfreesboro hospitality:

"We have eaten at Chili's, Quizno's," she said. "We just didn't realize how big it was, the city and the campus."

Ball said they had been staying at the DoubleTree hotel on Old Fort Parkway, eating at places like Ruby Tuesday's and Carrabas.

"We've been all over," he said.

"Murfreesboro has grown so much," she said.

Crossed-Up Cross in Chattanooga

Neighboroo is the easiest way to learn about neighborhoods.

A Neighboroo is someone who knows a lot about a neighborhood or a local area. They are the people you consult to find a new place to live, to figure out what are the "bad parts of town" or to find the "happening places".

A Guroo is someone who is an expert in national or local trends. Usually, they are professionals who study trends for a living either in real estate, business, consumer marketing, or demographics.

Neighboroo

The village's era as a party haven is over.

It's being replaced by high-rises, condos and a vision of Peachtree Road that could transform Buckhead into a place where people will live, work and walk.

Buckhead Rising

A gunman fatally shot six people at a private house party Saturday morning before committing suicide in the worst mass murder in this city in more than two decades, the Seattle police said.

The gunman had, like others at the party, attended a "rave" concert in the neighborhood and been invited back to the small two-story house in the Capitol Hill neighborhood.

7 Dead in Shooting at Seattle House Party