"If Bill Hicks were alive today,
What would Bill Hicks say?

In 250 words or less, please rant and let it fly.

Talk about politics or drugs or smoking or crappy celebrities or an update on the People Who Hate People party...whatever, just capture the essence of Bill Hicks.

Judges are still being assembled."

Read "The Virus" LOLOL

What Would Bill Hicks Say?

] A pair of Social Security employees told the Democratic
] Policy Committee they objected to internal agency
] documents that direct employees to talk about the
] system's problems and a need for reform.
]
] "That is a political message, and it's not my job as an
] agency employee to project a political message," said
] Debbie Fredericksen, who works in the Minneapolis field
] office and is a union representative.

Odd, but this is the sort of thing that was being heard from CIA not long ago...

Democrats Bash Bush Social Security Plan

] The public health burden related to unsafe sexual
] activity is three times higher in the U.S. than in other
] developed nations, according to researchers at the
] Centers for Disease Control and Prevention

Guess that combination of teaching abstinance but not actual birth control practices really does work wonders! To the tune of "20 million cases of adverse health conditions (7532 per 100,000 population) and 30,000 deaths"

Yep, quite the public health policy we've got going!

Unsafe Sex Burdens Health in U.S.

] The Army is now planning to keep at least 120,000
] soldiers in Iraq for the next two years to train and
] fight with Iraqi forces against insurgents, a senior Army
] general said yesterday.

Quagmire doesn't begin to describe this debacle.

U.S. troop level likely at 120,000 for 2 years

] Police say that after two men robbed the woman, one of
] them called the victim on his cell phone to apologize and
] to ask her out on a date.
]
]
] The victim, 18, declined the request, instead giving the
] cell phone number to police, who arrested Brent Brown,
] 25, on Thursday.

And again, something with no real point, just funny.

ABC News: Cops: Alleged Robber Calls Victim for Date

There's no point to this, it just made me laugh.

] The Eagles run through an inflatable tunnel and gigantic
] helmet before the game. The tunnel is sponsored by
] Levitra, the erectile drug. Before the game, as it was
] being inflated in the southwest corner of the end zone,
] the comedy dean of NFL writers, Larry Weisman of USA
] Today, leaned over to me and said: "If it doesn't deflate
] in four hours, are you supposed to call your doctor?"

Peter King - NFL - Turning points

] Flight BA175 was three hours into its journey to John F.
] Kennedy International Airport when it was forced to turn
] back to London's Heathrow Airport, where the passenger
] was met by police.

This is going to sound obvious, but why not just divert the plane to Keflavik in Iceland, take the guy off and send the plane on its way? I mean, if there's a bomb on it, it'll go boom and the problem would be solved, if there isn't, the guy is off the plane and the problem is solved. I mean I can think of a half dozen places to land the damn thing that don't involve going all the way back to Heathrow.

I'm just waiting for some country to pull a funny and tell Air Force One to leave their airspace because it has someone on their "terrorist" watch list on board.

British Flight Forced to Turn Back

] Many major medical groups support the use of emergency
] contraception, and the American College of Obstetricians
] and Gynecologists recommends that it be offered to all
] sexual assault victims who are at risk of pregnancy. But
] many conservative groups contend that use of emergency
] contraception can be a form of abortion in cases where
] fertilization has already occurred.

In other words, it's not good enough that you got raped, we're going to make you wait and find out if he got you pregnant too. Like it wasn't bad enough before?

Right to Lifers? Meet D Block. D Block? Virgin assholes.

Justice Rape Document Blasted for Omission

] According to their controversial study, an explosion of
] the Cumbre Vieja volcano on the island of La Palma could
] send a chunk of rock twice the size of the Isle of Wight
] into the Atlantic at up to 220 miles an hour.

That's a BIG rock!

Scientists: Volcano Could Swamp U.S. with Mega-Tsunami

] As traders cleared off their desks ready to ring in the
] new year, the dollar was on track for a dismal fourth
] quarter. The U.S. currency shed 10 percent against the
] euro and Swiss franc in the last three months.
]
]
] Against the yen, the dollar fell around 7 percent in the
] quarter.
]
]
] In the absence of any convincing signs of a substantial
] rebound in the greenback, traders added to their bets
] against the currency going into 2005.
]
]
] "If anyone is out there looking for a correction in the
] dollar, it just hasn't happened and there's no sign that
] it's going to happen in the upcoming days," said
] Investors Bank and Trust's Mazanec.

And the continuing tanking of the dollar continues.

Dollar Falls to New Low Vs Euro