quoted:
===

CUYAHOGA FALLS -- A member of Ohio's 5694th National Guard Unit in Mansfield legally changed his name to a Transformers toy.

Optimus Prime is heading out to the Middle East with his guard unit on Wednesday to provide fire protection for airfields under combat.

"On Sunday, we were awarded as the best firefighting unit in the Army National Guard in the entire country," said Prime. "That was a big moment for us."

Prime took his name from the leader of the Autobots Transformers, which were popular toys and a children's cartoon in the 1980s.

He legally changed his name on his 30th birthday and now it's on everything from his driver's licence, to his military ID, to his uniform.

National Guardsman changes his name to a 'Optimus Prime'

If you need a laugh during all of this...

The Gulf War Drinking Game

] To the person (or persons) who finds it funny to
] repeatedly position my star wars figurines in
] inappropriate positions, please stop.

Star Wars figurines

] 15 Iraqi soldiers guarding the border surrendered and
] crossed over to Kuwait this evening, officers here said.
]
] They are believed to be the first Iraqis to have
] surrendered, something the American Air Force has been
] actively encouraging by dropping more than 1 million
] leaflets in anticipation of a ground invasion.

Defections Come as U.S. and British Troops Prepare for War

] If the nation escalates to "red alert," which is the
] highest in the color-coded readiness against terror, you
] will be assumed by authorities to be the enemy if you so
] much as venture outside your home, the state's
] anti-terror czar says.

politechbot.com: 'Red alert' means New Jerseyans may not leave their homes

] A tobacco farmer claiming to have explosives held more
] than 100 police at bay from his partially submerged
] tractor Tuesday, paralyzing traffic and rattling nerves
] in a city already on heightened alert for terrorist
] threats and war with Iraq.

Why haven't we heard too much about this guy??

Standoff continues with man in tractor near Washington Monument

] "That site is an extremely important part of the retail
] component" of the waterfront plan," Fishman said. He
] called it "one of the anchors of the entertainment
] district."

THEN DON'T TEAR IT DOWN, LARRY!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't believe I worked for these people.

] Today there was another rubber band shooting occurrence.
] I want to remind you all that this is not acceptable
] behavior at work.

It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye.

Some companies have no sense of humor.

] Many of the 7,000-member Skver sect of Hasidim in New
] Square, 30 miles north of Manhattan, believe God has
] revealed himself in fish form.
]
] According to two fish-cutters at the New Square Fish
] Market, the carp was about to be slaughtered and made
] into gefilte fish for Sabbath dinner when it suddenly
] began shouting apocalyptic warnings in Hebrew.

The Observer | International | Word is made flesh as God reveals himself... as a fish

I watched our "fearless leader" speak last night, and I have to know: was I the only one who picked up on the fact that he was standing in front of a fake "East Room" backdrop? Usually he walks elegantly down that long hallway to the podium, last night he walked up from the side, and you could tell from the shadows around his hair and his ear that it was a backdrop. It was very distracting, and not a good fake. I wonder which bunker he was really in.