] It's okay...she's rich!

Anti-Bush ads. I've only managed to comb through a few, but the contest winner is definintely worth a look.

-janelane

Bush in 30 Seconds

] At the same time, it's not entirely surprising, given the
] backlash the retailer faced last year that eventually
] forced it to pull the plug on the A&F quarterlies that
] featured nude "teenage-looking" models in highly
] suggestive poses.
]
] Meanwhile, advocacy groups such a Citizens for Community
] Values (CCV) say that while the new publication is "much
] improved" over the past, it's still unacceptable to them.
]
] "The young book is the first response from the
] Abercrombie after they ended the quarterly. But we find
] that they're still pushing the envelope," said Bill
] Johnson, president of CCV.

The "Citizens for Community Values"? WTF? And God forbid someone push the envelope. Geez, if people did that all the time, why there'd be innovations left and right! Dang nappit!

-janelane

A&F cleans up its act with new publication called 'young'

] WEST PALM BEACH, Florida (AP) -- A businessman sued the
] promoters of the Atkins Diet and the estate of founder
] Dr. Robert Atkins, alleging that the low-carb, high-fat
] meal plan clogged his arteries and threatened his health.
]
] The suit by Jody Gorran, filed Wednesday in Palm Beach
] County Circuit Court, seeks $15,000.
]
] Gorran, 53, said Thursday he started the diet in May 2001
] because his weight had risen from 140 to 148 pounds. In
] two months, he said, his cholesterol rose from a normal
] 146 to an unhealthy 230, and by October 2003, he needed
] heart angioplasty to clear his arteries.

How much of an ignoramus do you have to be to think that the Atkins diet somehow negates the effects of eating too much meat? These are probably the same people that think, "Well, if one glass of wine a day is good for me, think how great 4 will be!"

I. Hate. Stupid. People.

-janelane

CNN.com - Man sues Atkins over heart problems - May 27, 2004

] 6 year old Jessica Lehman of Easley, SC. "Jesus died
] because He was weak and stupid."
]
] And here is dear Ashley, a 9 year old, the typical
] average age reader of Harry Potter: "I used to believe in
] what they taught us at Sunday School," said Ashley,
] conjuring up an ancient spell to summon Cerebus, the
] three-headed hound of hell. "But the Harry Potter books
] showed me that magic is real, something I can learn and
] use right now, and that the Bible is nothing but Boring
] lies."
]
] DOES THIS GET YOUR ATTENTION?
]
] If not, how about a quote from High Priest of Satanism:
] "Harry is an absolute god send to our cause," said High
] Priest Egan of the First Church Of Satan in Salem, MA.
] "An organization like ours thrives on new blood (no pun
] intended) and we've had more applicants than we can
] handle lately. And, of course, practically all of them
] are virgins, which is gravy."
]
] . . . .
]
] Still not convinced? I will leave you with something to
] let you make up your own mind. And finally, a quote from
] the author herself, J. K. Rowling, describing the
] objections of Christian reviewers to her writings:
]
] "I thinkit's absolute rubbish to protest children's books
] on the grounds that they are luring children to Satan,"
] Rowling told a London Times reporter in a July 17
] interview. "People should be praising them for that!
] These books guide children to an understanding that the
] weak, idiotic Son Of God is a living hoax who will be
] humiliated when the rain of fire comes ... while we, his
] faithful servants, laugh and cavort in victory."
]

ROFLMAO!

Urban Legends Reference Pages: Humor (Harry Potter)

] Sex is a subject which, because it has long been considered
] an inappropriate subject for public discourse in our
] society, is a particularly favorite topic of non-public
] discourse. We gossip about people who are having sex, we
] gossip about people who aren't having sex, and we gossip
] about people who are having too much sex. We titter about
] people who know too much about sex, and we chortle at
] people who know too little about sex.
]
] The latter point is well-represented in urban folklore,
] which abounds with tales of sexually naive adults who
] don't understand what sex is, have sex the "wrong" way,
] or don't grasp the rudiments of birth control. Thus we
] have tales of childless couples who discover their
] infertility is due to either a complete lack of
] intercourse or to the husband's mistakenly penetrating
] his wife's urethra (because no one ever explained sex or
] proper sexual techniques to them), couples who use
] prophylactics by placing them on the ends of bananas or
] broomsticks (because that's how condom use was
] demonstrated to them), and women aghast at finding
] themselves pregnant even though they've been consuming
] contraceptive jelly.

Update on the German couple who couldn't conceive due to a lack of the proper education.

-janelane

Urban Legends Reference Pages: Pregnancy (No Sex Please, We're Religious)

] At the end of the program, Love may petition to have the
] case dismissed. If she fails the drug program, she could
] be sentenced to at least 90 days in jail.
]
] The count to which she pleaded involved cocaine and other
] opiates found in her system. A count of disorderly
] conduct will most likely be dismissed at sentencing, Baik
] said.

Courtney Love does DRUGS???!!!! Well my world has just been turned upside down.

CNN.com - Love pleads guilty to misdemeanor drug charge - May 26, 2004

] Since it is clear that we cannot leave until they stop
] killing us, and equally clear that they will not stop
] killing us until we leave, I propose the following exit
] strategy:
] 1) Kill all the ones who are trying to kill us, in
] such a way that none of those who presently do not want
] to kill us suddenly start wanting to kill us.
] 2) At the moment of the death of the last person who
] wanted to kill us, race quickly out of the country before
] some additional person suddenly decides he/she wants to
] kill us, thus necessitating our continued presence in
] Iraq, in order to kill him/her.
] 3) Having left Iraq quickly, do not look back, so as
] not to witness individuals claiming they would have liked
] to kill us, which would then necessitate a return to
] Iraq, in order to etc., etc. (See No. 2, above.)

Good ole Slate. Better before MSN, but they are currently showing a surprising amount of Kerry support. This particular article is very tongue-in-cheek, so don't get your knickers in a bunch. :-)

-janelane

How to leave Iraq in three simple steps.

] FARGO, North Dakota (AP) -- A man who said he was fed up
] with his cellular phone service went to a Fargo mall and
] started hurling phones across a store, striking an
] employee and causing more than $2,000 in damage,
] authorities said.

Hahaha! Fargo! Go figure! Who would think there'd be crappy phone service in Fargo?!

At least he had sense enough to protect his eyes.

CNN.com - Man angry at Verizon hurls phones - May 14, 2004

Learn about the beast. Or, one of them....energy is such a sordid business these days.

The World According to Halliburton

] U.S. authorities released 293 prisoners Friday from the
] prison near Baghdad, the first mass prisoner release
] since images of abuse at the hands of the U.S. military
] surfaced several weeks ago.
]
] {snip}
]
] About a week ago, there were about 3,800 prisoners at Abu
] Ghraib. The new U.S. commander of detention operations in
] Iraq, Maj. Gen. Geoffrey Miller, said he plans to reduce
] that number to somewhere between 1,500 and 2,000.

Wow. Halliburton's contractors must be scared even more shitless.

CNN.com - Interrogation techniques banned in Iraq - May 14, 2004