| ] Christian pastors here at Landover Baptist thought their] tireless efforts to warn Americans about the carefully
 ] disguised homosexual agenda targeting toddlers through
 ] Disney cartoons was working. They thought that since
 ] President George W. Bush, a devout Christian who attends
 ] a Bible church regularly and believes in the same
 ] three-headed God (Father, Son, and flying side-kick, The
 ] Holy Ghost) took office, that Americans were finally
 ] waking up. Our pastors took for granted that Americans
 ] understood that Jesus is not above sending little
 ] children straight to Hell for watching cartoons. It
 ] wasn't until Pastor Deacon Fred heard that millions of
 ] American children were being lured like zombies in a
 ] trance to see the new Disney film, Finding Nemo, that he
 ] decided to speak out against it.
 ]
 ] "Walt Disney would be spinning in his grave if he knew
 ] his animation studios were full of giggling homosexuals,
 ] doodling and talking about silly colors and little
 ] fishies for their latest film," said Pastor Deacon Fred
 ] last Sunday. "But as we all know, Walt Disney never made
 ] it to Heaven. Although he hated Jews almost as much as
 ] the Apostle Paul did, he never took the time to accept
 ] Jesus Christ as his personal savior. So Mr. Disney is
 ] burning in Hell right now and God melted his eyes right
 ] out of his head.
 I *love* Landover Baptist Church!  One of the all-time greatest spoof sites I've seen. Children are Finding Nemo Instead of Finding Jesus, and the Homos at Disney are to Blame! |