] Once upon a time, there was a SPC Schwarz stationed with ] the Army in the Balkans. SPC Schwarz was either very ] clever or very bored; but probably both, since he managed ] to attempt or be warned about 213 things he wasn't ] allowed to do. He collected those things into a ] hillarious list and posted them to the web. The site ] hadn't been updated in a couple of years and has since ] gone away; but the list is classic, so I saved it. My Personal Favorites: -I am not authorized to sell mineral rights. -Not allowed to add 'In accordance with the prophesy' to the end of answers I give to a question an officer asks me. -Despite the confusing similarity in the names, the "Safety Dance" and the "Safety Briefing" are never to be combined. 213 things you can't do in the Army |