Are you looking for an experienced and professional Perl programmer who

* has been programming Perl professionally since 1994,
* has a BSc in Electronics & Computing and an MSc in Computer Science,
* has a considerable experience explaining the subtleties of Perl coding,
* can help you with your homework, school project, or graduation project,
* can help you when you're stuck at work, and
* can be paid with books?

Dear Tom and Nick. Please use this guy and clean up the nasty that is the Memestreams back-end. I've seen it and I don't ever want to use CGI+Perl again...

You can pay him in books for godsakes! ;-)

...

P.S. I'm only 1/4 joking.